


Allergic

by sastieljpg (ACometAppears)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-02
Updated: 2014-03-02
Packaged: 2018-01-14 08:37:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1259938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ACometAppears/pseuds/sastieljpg
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A few times, in a drunken state, Castiel had brought up the topic of them getting a pet - specifically, a cat. Sam had shrugged it off, because he’d usually forget the request by the time he was sober. Eventually, Sam can't pretend any longer.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Allergic

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the prompt “allergic to cats” from tumblr user bunkbuddylucifer. Mentions of soulless!Sam and the end of 6x06 'You Can't Handle The Truth'.

A few times, in a drunken state, Castiel had brought up the topic of them getting a pet - specifically, a cat. Sam had shrugged it off, because he’d usually forget the request by the time he was sober. 

But then he’d brought it up in the middle of the day, when Sam couldn’t pretend he hadn’t heard or that it hadn’t happened. Sam had been conducting research, like usual, and Castiel had been pretending to help while watching him (also like usual). Sam doesn’t find the staring creepy - he likes looking up to see the angel is there, with him, watching over him. It’s just what he does. 

"Can we get a cat?" 

Sam’s stomach drops. He looks up at Castiel’s eager, inquisitive face, and finds he has to look away immediately, unable to meet his gaze. He looks around the library for a source of inspiration for an excuse. He comes up with nothing, and so has to think quickly, looking down at his journal as he speaks:  
"I … I’m allergic," He replies, with a quick apologetic expression. Castiel frowns, staring at Sam curiously for a moment, but doesn’t make any further comment. He simply nods, and goes back to pretending to read. Sam looks back down at his book, too, though he’s unable to concentrate anymore. 

He knows the nightmares will come tonight. 

He doesn’t tell Castiel, though: so now, the angel watches as Sam sweats and fidgets in his sleep, his limbs making jerking little movements; his hands held up defensively to his chest, as if trying to push someone off. 

"Sam," Castiel murmurs, turning the bedside lamp on and watching over him. Sam’s mumbling now, half-words and small, soft cries. Castiel doesn’t quite know what to do: so, he takes Sam’s wrists in his hands, in an effort to still his restless movements.  
"Sam," He repeats, more insistently, "Wake up," 

It takes a few seconds - full of frantic struggling and whimpers - but Sam’s eyes eventually snap open, his breathing still erratic and uneven. He stares unseeingly up at Castiel for a moment, before recognition registers in his eyes. 

"Cas?" He asks, frowning and appearing confused.  
"It’s okay. You are safe now," The angel reassures him. It’s his usual greeting to the younger Winchester, which he uses every time Sam has a nightmare (which is all-too frequently). But none have been as intense as this one, leading to his confusion about just what was going on, and how to deal with it. 

"Would you like to talk about it?" Castiel asks, withdrawing his hands from Sam’s wrist, and rubbing a soothing hand on his chest.  
"… I-" Sam pauses, about to say no, but then deciding to come clean, "I’m not allergic to cats, Cas,"  
"Pardon?" The angel asks, confused about how that revelation relates to the nightmare.  
"Earlier … I lied. It’s just - I have this memory, from my time when I was … When I didn’t have a-" He gestures to himself vaguely.  
"When you were soulless," Castiel supplies. Sam nods. His hands flop down to the sheets; one of them goes to Cas’ hand on his chest, interweaving their fingers for comfort, as he continues: "We were hunting this goddess … Veritas. Goddess of truth. She had all these cats around her house … They were everywhere,"  
"And so now you are afraid of cats?" Castiel asks.  
"Yeah … Sort of associate them with something that happened in her house. That was what my nightmare was about," He explains, finding it difficult to admit to having these feelings out loud. 

"She hurt you?" Castiel asks, his voice harder than before, angry at the thought of Sam being hurt or scared.  
"… Dean did, Cas," 

Castiel doesn’t know what to say to that. His mouth falls open a fraction, about to ask about it - but then he decides to let Sam get to it in his own time. 

A few seconds later, Sam asks, “You remember when you found out I didn’t have a soul, and I was all messed up from a fight?” Castiel nods, not liking where this is headed. “That was Dean who did that - he found out something was wrong, he thought I did it on purpose, he wouldn’t listen, he just kept punching me in the face, hitting me over and over and over-”

A tear leaks from one of Sam’s eyes as he remembers; in the lamplight, his eyes shine with the promise of further tears. 

"I am sorry, Sam," Castiel tells him, his face twisted in sympathy and regret, as he withdraws the hand on Sam's chest. "I’m sorry I pulled you out of hell soulless … I’m sorry I stuck my arm into your chest, I’m sorry you were hurt - I’m sorry for bringing up these feelings in you, I - I didn’t mean to," Cas apologises profusely, dismayed by the distress he’s caused the man he loves most in the whole of creation. 

Sam gives a shaky sigh, and nods a few times, whispering, “I know, I know,” 

Castiel reaches out hesitantly, afraid to touch Sam, lest he bring up more memories of how once his hand had plunged into his chest, torturing him - but Sam nods, clearly reading Castiel’s conflict on his face. The angel reaches out, tucking a lock of hair, a little damp with sweat, behind Sam’s ear; he places his hand on Sam's chest once more, with his permission. 

Sam smiles weakly, through his sadness. Castiel takes the opportunity to instil a little grace into his touch, making the hunter feel much better; helping him forget the hideous things he has felt at the hands of the ones he loves, and experience how good the angel can make him feel, in recompense. 

Sam’s eyes flutter shut, and his chest rises and falls slowly, savouring the feeling of complete, all-consuming love and calm that washes over him. When Castiel’s hand pulls away, he strokes it down Sam’s arm and to the hand that isn’t interlinked with his own other one, on his chest. 

"We don’t need a cat, Sam. It was a silly suggestion," He admits, settling back down to the bed, and draping himself across Sam, until the hunter rolls over, and they’re spooning with Cas’ arms enveloping Sam’s torso; his legs entwined with Sam’s. 

"Nah, it wasn’t," Sam mumbles sleepily, "Maybe something smaller … Maybe a guinea pig," 

Castiel falls asleep smiling against the skin of Sam’s back, still radiating grace, to keep his hunter’s nightmares at bay. Those days were over - now, they had each other. And as long as Cas was there, Sam would be safe. He vowed to never let anyone harm him like that again.


End file.
